I'm back!! Married!! We're both slightly heavier on the left hand side now, not from eating too many Jimmy's Pies (a South Island delicacy, google them) but because Andrea and I got married on the 23rd of April down in Arrowtown, South Island, New Zealand. Monday was our first day back at work and things are going great.
For those interested, our wedding day was nothing short of spectacular, the weather was exceptionally kind to us (even though it had been bucketing down at 3am with forecasts for torrential rain for the rest of the day), everyone had a fantastic time, rave reviews and yes, we can all agree on the fact that I punched well above my weight class being lucky enough to have Andrea think I'm fine, right?
Truly, I am a lucky man. Much dancing was done (no, I did not bust out my robot although I was tempted), music was brilliant (some Foo Fighters, little bit of Faith No More, some Cruzados), we had a great time and were lucky to have had the pleasure of so many people we care about attending even though it was such a big trip for some.
18-20 months in the planning and organised by ourselves, our wedding day couldn't have gone better. It was nothing short of epic. Even the hen and stag nights went off without incident.
Well, except for the fact my brother Dave (best man) broke his arm on the mechanical bull - but of course carried on partying like a rock star since we Leggatt boys do well in the pain threshold dept - and everyone else sustained minor injuries like rib and back bruising. Now my ride (yes, I know, just had back surgery but some things just cannot be denied) simply ended up making me feel a lot better. And I lasted second longest.
My physio is now considering getting in a mechanical bull for those messed up spine patients like I had been. I reckon she should. I could do with another turn...
Now as per all my blog posts, it is always my style to offer up any challenges faced so can pass on things we learned and how we handled so that these things may one day help you. And not just for a wedding.
Challenge # 1 – stay with me here.
Cats like fuckn cheese. No, it is a true story. Don't bother arguing with me. I once owned a cat who was mad for cheesy pizza. Mad enough to write a children's book about. Jack the Pizza Eating Cat.
I can see your face right now so let me clarify. In my groom speech, I immediately referenced that I was like "the cat who got the cheese" referring to how incredible Andrea looked (I swear she was glowing) and how happy I was to be her groom. Happy Dazza, grinning from ear to ear. One of our beloved guests decided she would correct me by saying "cream". What was in my head surely wasn't appropriate to voice so I had to let it slide. Was still great for a laugh but I stand by the fact cats do dig cheese in a big way.
A learning that my wife was able to take away from this? Husband is cool, he probably should have done more prep for his speech rather than just "winging it" and yes, he is a little different. Absolute true story though, she may have known this one already when she signed up.
Challenge # 2 - we left the rings behind at the house. Yup. The two crucial items for any successful wedding, these shiny circular items were happily sitting on a bedside table back at the Book-A-Bach we rented wondering where we had all disappeared to. Seems our amazing photographer moved them for some shots prior to us tying them in a pretty bow to be brought along to the chapel. Shit.
So what were the lessons we learned from this?
Lesson # 1 – both of us have very strong hearts – neither of us exploded internally.
Lesson # 2 - Lizzie, our mid 50's driver of one of the daimlers we had as wedding cars, can drive really fast and jump fences all in the name of love. Impressive commitment for love for sure!
Lesson # 3 - sometimes when you have planned things down to the very minute for something so hugely important, not all things can (or will) go smoothly, no matter how meticulous you are. Always make a suitable amount of well-considered room for errors and always triple check your work, utilise those around you as sounding boards too depending on importance of what you're working on.
Lesson # 4 – sometimes when things go wrong, things can actually go much better. With the rings left behind and a mad drive back to the house by one of the car drivers, Andrea was stuck waiting outside the chapel whilst I was standing inside it with all our guests. 25 minutes round trip to get the rings? Nothing we could do but wait. I considered busting out into song, but it didn't take long before both of us, began to really relax. The pressure was off. Something had gone wrong. I know, it sounds weird. But that's exactly what happened.
See, those rings sitting ever so innocently on that bedside table, actually took the pressure off of both of us as our meticulously planned day had had its first hiccup. At the time it was a biggie. But there was nothing we could do but wait. A dent in our amour of planning had occurred. It's kind of like what happens to your nerves in a fight when that first strike catches you. You're shaking with the nervous adrenaline right up until the pain comes – and then you realise you can handle it. It's a feeling of relief.
And that's when you just get on with it. And that's exactly what we did.
NOTE - I am in no way likening my getting married to a fight. Sheeesh.
Queue shortest marriage in history.
Seriously though, we had an incredible day! My lovely wife had her dream wedding. Quote un-quote. It's a pretty good feeling knowing we pulled that dream come true out of the bag. We got it done AF people.
So yes, to the learnings. To the many of us who are set back by mistakes or errors as we're aiming for our lofty goals or trying to deliver projects or get through workloads, it is important you see any setbacks for what they are.
Each one is a key opportunity to grow/learn, a chance to realise that no matter how intensive our planning to deliver, it is okay (of course depending on severity and importance) for something to go wrong in a purely personal growth perspective. Like one of my earlier posts, mistakes mean you're trying. Sometimes they can be a pressure off moment. Sometimes it can be a pressure on moment that can wake you up to perform even better. The trick is to not let them stop you performing your very best. You just rally yourself and back yourself. You can still succeed!
The other simple fact is, we ALL make mistakes. Do your level best to mitigate making big ones, never be too proud to ask for advice, feedback or help etc. Always learn from any mistakes you make and correct them as fast and as best you can. After all, it's how we all grow.
All that said, I am so glad that we had such an incredible day and holiday, we are pleased to be back (although another week might have been just the ticket aye boss hahaha) and we have been besieged with well wishes, handshakes of congrats and genuine smiling welcome's back.
Here are a few pictures. Enjoy.
[Dazza drops the mic]